Sheldon/Penny Moments :)
Sheldon: Penny! Penny! Penny!
Penny: Sheldon, honey, I’ve told you, it’s a small apartment. You only have to knock one time.
Sheldon: Please, please, I don’t have a lot of time. Look, Ramona finally dozed off, and I need you to help me get rid of her.
Penny: Get rid of her how?
Sheldon: I don’t know, but apparently I’m in some kind of relationship, and you seem to be an expert at ending them.
Penny: Excuse me?
Sheldon: I see man after man leaving this apartment never to return.
Penny: Okay, first of all, it is not man after man.
Ramona: Dr. Cooper?
Sheldon: Hide me.
Penny: Hide you?
Sheldon: I formally request sanctuary.
Sheldon: Well, I’m sorry, but that is your second strike.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: You have two strikes. Three strikes and you’re out. It’s a sports metaphor.
Penny: A sports metaphor?
Sheldon: Yes, baseball.
Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well, your ken can kiss my Barbie.
Penny: Sheldon, where are my clothes?
Sheldon: You know, I do recall seeing some female undergarments.
Penny: Where was that?
Sheldon: Oh, yes… Earlier this evening, I happened to gaze out the window nd a brassiere caught my eye. Do those look familiar?
Penny: How the hell did you get them up on that telephone wire?
Sheldon: When you understand the laws of physics, Penny, anything is possible. And may I add: mwuh-ha-ha.
Penny: Get them down.
Sheldon: Apologize.
Penny: Never.
Sheldon: Well, then may I suggest you get a very long stick and play panty pinata.
Sheldon: Penny…
Penny: Yes?
Sheldon: Well played.
Penny: Thank you.
Sheldon: Just remember: with great power comes great responsibility.
Penny: Understood.
Sheldon: What he may have left out is how important this relationship is to me.
Penny: To you?
Sheldon: Yes, see, of the handful of women leonard’s been involved with, She’s the only one I have ever found tolerable.
Penny: Well, what about me?
Sheldon: The statement stands for itself.
Penny: Well, aren’t you sweet?
Sheldon: You say that now, but consider the following senario. You’re sitting in your apartment, It’s late, you’re alone. Your hypothalamus is swimming in a soup of estrogen and progesterone and suddenly even Leonard seems like a viable sexual candidate. Or a, uh, “hookup” As it’s referred to by today’s urban youth.
Penny: Really?
Sheldon: Yes. Now, should that happen, I would ask you to find some way to suppress your libido.
Penny: I could think about you.
Sheldon: Fine, whatever works.
Penny: Always nice talking to you, sheldon.
Sheldon: Uh, peace out!
Sheldon: Penny! Penny!
(Penny open the door)
Penny: What?
Sheldon: … Penny
Sheldon: Great. New topic. Where are you in your menstrual cycle?
Penny: What?!
Sheldon: I’ve been doing some research online, and apparently female primates, You know, uh, apes, chimpanzees, you. They find their mate more desirable When he’s being courted by another female. Now, This effect is intensified when the rival female Is secreting the pheromones associated with ovulation. Which brings me back to my question. Where are you in your—
(Penny close the door)
Sheldon: Clearly, I’m 14 days too early.
Sheldon (computer): Penny. Penny. Penny.
Penny: Sheldon?
Sheldon (computer): I have an inflamed larynx.
Penny: Okay?
Sheldon (computer): We’re out of herbal tea. Do you have any?
Penny: Okay,let me check.
Sheldon (computer): Some hiney would be nice,too.
Penny: Hiney?
Sheldon (computer): Honey.
Penny: Sheldon! What did you do?!
Sheldon: I know! It’s not enough, is it?… Here.
Penny: Leonard, look! Sheldon’s hugging me.
Leonard: It’s a Saturnalia miracle.
Penny: Ooh, ooh, shut the door, shut the door.
Sheldon: Why?
Penny: Just do it!
(Sheldon close the door)
Penny: Get inside and shut the door.
Sheldon: Well, you didn’t specify.
Penny: Is Leonard around?
Sheldon: He went to the movies without me. It was the only option. I’m sorry, I don’t understand which social situation this is. Could you give me some guidance as to how to proceed?
Penny: The building manager’s showing an apartment downstairs, and I haven’t paid my rent.
Sheldon: Oh, I see. Penny, I’m not sure I’m comfortable harboring a fugitive from the 2311 North Los Robles Corporation.
Sheldon: Just one thing before we start.
Leonard: What is it, Sheldon?
Penny: What the hell?
Sheldon: That was for my cushion.
Leonard: Sheldon, Penny was our only hope.
Sheldon: I’m sorry, Leonard. But revenge is a dish best served cold.
Penny: Screw that.
Sheldon: She can’t shoot me. She’s dead.
Penny: Okay, I got a box, but there’s no key in here. Just letters.
Sheldon: That’s the wrong box. Put it back.
Penny: Oh, Sheldon, are these letters from your grandmother?
Sheldon: Don’t read those letters!
Penny: Oh, look, she calls you “Moon Pie.” That is so cute.
Sheldon: Put down the letters!
Sheldon: I’m back.
Penny: What up, Moon Pie?
Sheldon: Nobody calls me Moon Pie but Meemaw!
Sheldon: Penny. Penny. Penny.
Penny: Hey,Sheldon.
Sheldon: It’s 11:00 a.m.
Penny: I know. You’re safe.
Penny: And you know about that stuff?
Sheldon: Penny… I’m a physicist. I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains.
Penny: Who’s Radiohead?
Sheldon: I have a working knowledge of the important things in the universe. Good luck.
Penny&Sheldon: Please pay attentn and listen to me. Give me some time to blow the man down. I’m a deepwater sailor just come from Hong Kong. Give me way,hey,blow the man down. If you give me some whiskey I’ll sing you a song. Give me some time to blow the man down.
Leonard: Hello?
Penny&Sheldon: Hello. Come quickly lay aft To the break of the poop. To me way,hey,blow the man down. Or I’ll help you along with the toe of my boot. Give me some time to blow the man down.
Sheldon: Penny,this is your enterprise, so it’s ultimately your decision, but based on the quality of his work, I’d strongly recommend that we let Leonard go.
Leonard: You want to fire me?
Sheldon: What I want is irrelevant. This is Penny’s decision. Penny?
Sheldon: I believe I’m hearing some negativity on the factory floor.
Penny: So?
Sheldon: Penny,the labor force is a living organism that must be carefully nurtured. Any counterproductive grumbling must be skillfully headed off by management. Observe. Less talk,more work!
Penny: Nicely done.
Sheldon: Thank you. You hear any union talk,you let me know.
Penny: Someone’s in the kitchen with Dinah… Sheldon? Sheldon!
Sheldon: ‘Cause I sold my soul to the company store.
Penny: Honey,do you want some coffee?
Sheldon: I don’t drink coffee.
Penny: Come on,but if you don’t stay awake we’ll never finish in time.
Sheldon: I’m sorry,coffee’s out of the question. When I moved to California,I promised my mother that I wouldn’t start doing drugs.
Penny: Here,this will help.
Sheldon: Very well,but if this leads to opiates or hallucinogenics, you’re going to have to answer to my mother.
Sheldon: Zoom,zoom,zoom! Where’s the coffee?
Penny: We’re all out.
Sheldon: No problem. I’ll be back before this banana hits the ground. Zoom,zoom,zoom,zoom! Zoom,zoom,zoom,zoom!
*Knock, Knock, Knock*
Sheldon: Penny
*Knock, Knock, Knock*
Sheldon: Penny
*Knock, Knock, Knock*
Sheldon: Penny…
